Dealing with Betrayal

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Betrayal can come in many and  various forms. It can be as simple, if you want to call it simple, as someone betraying your trust through telling another what you thought was told in confidence. There is the betrayal within marriages through adulterous behavior. Betrayal can come through domestic abuse. Maybe someone at your job betrayed you by lying to the boss. There’s many examples of how we are betrayed.

In my opinion (and many psychiatrists) the most damaging, deep, and most heartfelt betrayal is through a parent sexually abusing their child. From within the womb we are totally and completely dependent upon our mothers and fathers. Upon birth that dependence grows even more for the child. The child depends on the parents for nurturing, education, love for God, not to mention clothing, food, and housing. God instilled in us love. We are created to love and we do it naturally as a child. We love our parents regardless of anything they do.

Children are taught to hate, to distrust, to be suspicious and to take the blame. They were not born with that negativity. We’ve all seen cases where a child is horribly abused and yet they will protect the parent. It isn’t always that the parent/abuser has threatened them to keep quiet, it’s because of that God-given love instilled within us toward those who God chose to be our parents.

I was asked recently if after having been sexually abused if having my Dad admit to the abuse, if that was emotionally more difficult than the actual abuse. My answer was no, not for me. For me it was confirmation that the abuse really did take place. It stopped all the mind wrestling of whether it happened or not and put an end to the lies that were being told about it didn’t happen. But not everyone can answer that way. It is always very difficult to admit we have been betrayed. Especially if that betrayal was from someone we love.

Sexual abuse/incest is the most damaging of all abuse to a child. It attacks the body, soul, mind, and spirit of the child. The issues that are left from it are so vast it can take years to heal from the devastation. Most abusers will not admit their guilt. Many mothers will blame the victim or deny it happened or choose the husband over the child. Hopefully with disclosure becoming more prevalent that will change.

Who of us want to have to admit to ourselves that those who were given to us by God could do such a thing? Who wants to admit that the man we chose to love for the rest of our lives would sneak around behind our back in an adulterous affair? Or that our best friend would reveal a deep secret we shared, with someone else?

Betrayal will leave deep wounds. Whether they are bleeding wounds that we ignore, or ones that we continue to pick at is our choice. In the case of sexual abuse it may take years to heal those deep wounds. In Psalm 27:10 The Lord says, “Though my father and mother forsake me, the LORD will receive me.” Betrayal through abuse , by a parent, is forsaking the child! They have forsaken their God-given responsibility to care for, in a Christ-like manner, for the child that was placed in their care. Mothers and fathers that do nothing to protect the child, a co-conspirator, has emotionally, and in some cases physically, abandoned the child. Christ is there to receive you!

With any betrayal it is hard to “wrap our minds around” what was done. There is hurt, anger, denial, and eventually acceptance. We have a big choice to make. Do we forgive or do we continue to bleed? It can be mind-boggling to think that our own parents could betray us in such a way but if we do not release that hurt, through forgiveness, the betrayal will be like a gunny sack filled with rocks on our back.

With any form of betrayal do we choose to live with a heart filled with hate and bitterness toward those who have betrayed us or do we turn to Christ and give Him our pain? By holding onto the pain, not forgiving, we are bringing God’s judgment against us.  (Matt.5:22) We are hindering our prayers, (Matt.5:23) we’re causing a root of bitterness to take hold, (Heb.12:14-15) we’re allowing demonic strongholds to take hold, (Eph.4:26), and halting our healing (James 5:16).

Freedom from the heart wounds inflicted by an act/s of betrayal is obtained through our ability to seek Christ’s forgiveness and to offer our forgiveness to others.

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Blessings to you.

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The Real Terror Behind Terrorists

If this doesn’t make you mad nothing will!

“Today the world is appalled…”  and takes in yet another political punch…

In a recent televised speech, Obama voiced his condolences to the family of American journalist, James Foley.   Obama went on to explain that his heart is broken, and “No just God would stand for what they did and what they do every single day.”  (click here to see his full speech).

Foley, who risked his life to report on the humanitarian violations in the middle east, was captured and held hostage for two years in Syria, before being beheaded by the militant ISIS group.  It has been reported that U.S. officials were aware of his capture.  The announcement of Foley’s death came by a video posted by a  jihadist ISIS Terrorist.  The date of Foley’s death remains unknown.  The video, once viral on youtube, has since been banned due to its graphic content.

I watched and I listened to the speech of Obama.  I prayed for the family of…

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Trust and Believe

When we trust in Christ He helps us through life’s difficulties.

Cyber Support Group

Trust and believe, my gentle friend

In all you say and do, 

For Christ will take you by the hand

And He will see you through. 

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Trust and believe, my gentle friend

No matter what’s in store;

The Lord will be there at your side,

As He’s always been before.

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Trust and believe, my gentle friend,

With all your heart and soul –

The Master will take care of you,

And help you reach your goal.

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Trust and believe, my gentle friend,

Reach out to heaven above,

And God will smile down on you,

And touch you with His love!

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Written by Hope C. Oberhelman – Angels by Grace – June 1998

http://www.elahministries.com   http://www.suespen2paper.com

http://www.facebook.com/elahministries   elah501c@bellsouth.net

Blessings to you.

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How the Internet Got Started – According to the Bible

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy.

 

Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg.

 

Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.

 

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, “Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?”

 

Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, “How dear?”

 

Dot replied, “I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath the best price. The sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah’s Pony Stable. (UPS).”

 

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums.

 

The drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever having to move from his tent.

 

To prevent neighboring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew. It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures – Hebrew To The People (HTTP).

 

And the young men did take to Dot Com’s trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung.

 

They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or NERDS.

 

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land. Indeed he did insist on drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates’ drumheads and drumsticks.

 

And Dot did say, “Oh Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others.”

 

And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or eBay as it came to be known.

 

He said, “We need a name that reflects what we are.”

 

And Dot replied, Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators.” “YAHOO,” said Abraham. And because it was Dot’s idea, they named it YAHOO DOT COM.

 

Abraham’s cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot’s drums to locate things around the countryside.

 

It soon became known as God’s Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).

 

That is how it all began. And that’s the truth!

 

http://www.elahministries.com  www.cybersupportgroup.org

http://www.facebook.com/elahministries   elah501c@bellsouth.net

 

Blessings to you.

False Memory Syndrome

Cyber Support Group

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Many of us grew up in homes where Satan’s influences were more prevalent than Christ’s. All forms of abuse took place and for those who have experienced abuse, particularly sexual abuse, coping mechanisms and defense mechanisms can take place within the victim.

In the case of sexual abuse the victim can repress those memories so deeply that as an adult she/he may “forget” the abuse occurred. But it isn’t that easy because our brains don’t forget. Like a computer, even though we delete something, it’s still hidden somewhere in the hard drive. It will come up at sometime with the right buttons pushed!

The victim may eventually go for counseling for depression or anger issues or any number of reasons. One in particular is feelings that “something happened” or flash backs of abuse begin to occur. Others may know they were abused but can’t recall everything and the family members…

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