I’ve referred to, commented on, and called myself a “curious cat” a couple of times in the past. Well, my curiosity has just about done me in this time.

In writing the article about being on the New York Times Best Seller list and Amazon’s Best Seller list I did a little more nosing around.

I shouldn’t have!

I said back when starting this blog I would be honest and transparent. Well, today is one of those really transparent and honest days.

I feel like quitting! I feel like all the hard work, all the thousands of dollars I have spent on getting fiction and non-fiction books out for the public to enjoy is a huge waste of time and money.

I’m discouraged. I know, we all feel that way at one time or another. I started writing in 2006-2007 and had that first book published in 2008. For the years following I have written more and I have been proud of my books.

The stories are God inspired, have good Godly messages in them, and have been enjoyed by those who have read them. Anyway, that’s the reports I have gotten from readers.

So why discouraged? Why do I feel like I should just quit? I happened across one of my books for sale on one of the book selling sites. It’s one of the later novels and to my shock, and disappointment, it’s listed for sale for $2.94. That is not a used book either!

Between the publishing fee, the books I had to buy to sell on my own, plus book marks, etc, my $5,000.00 + investment is now only worth, $2.94.

I want to cry! I ask, “Why bother?” “Why waste the hard earned money for this?” “Why stay up all night writing and editing?” “Why wait in anticipation to see the end product?”

Tears are fighting to spill.

As discouraged as I feel right now at seeing one of my books for sale at a used book price, “Why bother to continue?” is heavy on my mind.

I can give you the answer as to why not quit in one word…

Obedience!

But this is a really hard pill to swallow.

Stick around – Hopefully better news next time

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