MESOPOTAMIA — Recently discovered evidence has led biblical scholars to believe Noah made the mistake of washing his ark the day before it began raining. This new understanding has given researchers reason to think the flood itself may have been the result of this rookie mistake.
“Noah clearly didn’t think ahead with this decision,” said Professor Blake Rumsey at the Institute of Genesis Theology. “Everyone knows there’s a universal rule that it’s going to rain the day after you wash your vehicle. Noah lost sight of that fact, leading to 40 days and nights of rain, billions of deaths, and essentially, the reshaping of the entire earth.”
Noah reportedly spent approximately 100 years building the ark, and upon finishing it, he thought it would be a good idea to give it a good washing. “Finally done!” witnesses heard Noah say. “Now I’ll clean her up real…
THESE ARE ACTUAL COMPLAINTS RECEIVED BY “THOMAS COOK VACATIONS” FROM DISSATISFIED CUSTOMERS:
1. “They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax.”
2. “On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don’t like spicy food.”
3. “We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish.”
4. “We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our own swimsuits and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price.”
5. “The beach was too sandy. We had to clean everything when we returned to our room.”
6. “We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as white but it was more yellow.”
7. “It’s lazy of the local shopkeepers in Puerto Vallartato close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during ‘siesta’ time — this should be banned.”
8. “No-one told us there would be fish in the water. The children were scared.”
9. “Although the brochure said that there was a fully equipped kitchen, there was no egg-slicer in the drawers.”
10. “I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local convenience store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts.”
11. “The roads were uneven and bumpy, so we could not read the local guide book during the bus ride to the resort. Because of this, we were unaware of many things that would have made our holiday more fun.”
12. “It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England. It took the Americans only three hours to get home. This seems unfair.”
13. “I compared the size of our one-bedroom suite to our friends’ three-bedroom and ours was significantly smaller.”
14. “The brochure stated: ‘No hairdressers at the resort.’ We’re trainee hairdressers and we think they knew and made us wait longer for service.”
15. “When we were in Spain, there were too many Spanish people there. The receptionist spoke Spanish, the food was Spanish. No one told us that there would be so many foreigners.”
16. “We had to line up outside to catch the boat and there was no air-conditioning.”
17. “It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel.”
18. “I was bitten by a mosquito. The brochure did not mention mosquitoes.”
19. “My fiancée and I requested twin-beds when we booked, but instead we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be re-reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked.”
A cowboy rode into a small town in Oklahoma and stopped at a saloon for a beer. What he didn’t know was that the locals had a habit of playing pranks on strangers. When he finished his beer and went outside, he found that his horse had been stolen.
He went back into the saloon, flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head, fired a shot into the ceiling, and yelled, “Which one of you sidewinders stole my horse?”
No one answered.
“All right, I’m gonna have another beer,” said the cowboy. “If my horse ain’t back outside by the time I finish, I’m gonna do what I done in Texas! And I don’t like to have to do what I done in Texas!”
The cowboy had another beer, and when he went outside, his horse had been returned to the post. He saddled up and got ready…
If you have read my new novel please go to Amazon and Barnes and Noble and write your comments of how you enjoyed, or did not enjoy, On Eagle’s Wings. I have sold several at book signings, etc. so it doesn’t matter if you bought from either of these outlets. It really helps in the sales of any book when people can read what others say about it.
Thank you so much and I hope you enjoyed my new suspense novel.
YOU WILL LAUGH, CRY, GET MAD, AND REJOICE THROUGH 479 SUSPENSE FILLED PAGES
Ginny fights and screams as she’s being thrown into the trunk of a car and the lid slammed shut. She later finds herself in a small room of a warehouse with a man standing with a hypodermic needle before her. She screams and scoots as far away as she can. Will Ginny escape or will she be rescued and why has she been kidnapped?
A PORTION OF THE PROCEDES SUPPORT INTO THE LIGHT MINISTRY
YOU WILL LAUGH, CRY, GET MAD, AND REJOICE THROUGH 479 SUSPENSE FILLED PAGES
Ginny fights and screams as she’s being thrown into the trunk of a car and the lid slammed shut. She later finds herself in a small room of a warehouse with a man standing with a hypodermic needle before her. She screams and scoots as far away as she can. Will Ginny escape or will she be rescued and why has she been kidnapped?
A PORTION OF THE PROCEDES SUPPORT INTO THE LIGHT MINISTRY
Ginny fights and screams as she’s being thrown into the trunk of a car and the lid slammed. She later finds herself in a small room of a warehouse with a man standing with a hypodermic needle before her. She screams and scoots as far away as she can. Will Ginny be rescued and why has she been kidnapped?
YOU WILL LAUGH, CRY, GET MAD, AND REJOICE THROUGH 479 SUSPENSE FILLED PAGES
TO BE RELEASED MAY 2, 2023
Ginny fights and screams as she’s being thrown into the trunk of a car and the lid slammed. She later finds herself in a small room of a warehouse with a man standing with a hypodermic needle before her. She screams and scoots as far away as she can. Will Ginny be rescued and why has she been kidnapped?
A PORTION OF THE PROCEDES SUPPORT INTO THE LIGHT MINISTRY
Sue Cass does it again! Sue takes a tough Another great read by Sue! On
assignment of writing a compelling story. Eagle’s Wings is heartwarming,
On Eagle’s Wings will tug at your heart as heart wrenching and hope filled,
you feel the pain of the evilness of sin but all in the same breath. She will
the story does not stop there. With each have you thinking you’ve got the
page you turn, you will rejoice at hope story almost figured out, and
that is discovered in Jesus Christ. We all another plot twist will be found
need to be reminded of this powerful truth just as you turn the next page. I
of Isaiah 40:31 thoroughly enjoyed reading, as
Mark Smith, Lead Pastor her stories seem to come alive
Abundant Life Church through the characters’ struggles
I just received the final forms to check and return to my publisher for my new book, On Eagle’s Wings. I’ve sent it back and have been notified that it now has a release date of May 2, 2023.
The publisher will be sending me pre-release order information and I’ll post that as I get it. Stay tuned folks, this is a novel you will definitely want to read. My roommate helped with proof reading and editing and she says, “It’s a damn good book!”
479 pages of spell binding suspense
$24.99
It will be available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Ingram, etc.
Sue's Pen 2 Paper Blog 