The night was long with everything under the sun running rampantly through my mind. The pillow didn’t feel right, flipping from one side to the other side my body was taking a beating. Sitting up, laying down, wanting to pull my hair out and scream, rebuking the devil, sleep finally comes.
The new day has dawned all too quickly and dragging my weary body to the edge of the bed I ask the Lord, “What would You have me do today?” I’m hoping He’ll say, “Oh My sweet child, you’re so tired just roll over and go back to sleep. You need your rest.”
Sitting there hoping upon hope, I await the sweet words of the Lord. “Do what I told you to do yesterday,” was His reply. With a groan I go about showering, getting dressed, and shoveling a bowl of cereal down my throat one spoon full at a time.
Grabbing the long list of items I need to get at Sam’s I make my way to the car. “You forgot the C.D.’s” the Lord says. Hands on the steering wheel, motor running, garage door up, “Oh I’ll take them some other time.” “Take them now. You’ll be close to her house.” You see, I had some C.D.’s and a D.V.D. I needed to return to my friend who lives just a couple of miles from Sam’s, which is a 20 minute drive for me.
I spend a couple of hours in Sam’s gathering up the supplies I need. Those things that are essential for every day living; huge packages of toilet paper that won’t require my making another run to store any time soon. No-siree, I hate shopping so to be able to buy in bulk makes me quite happy. Grabbing the big bundle of Kleenex with several boxes all bundled together pleases me to no end and the family size bags of potato chips last so much longer than the regular size. Essentials you see, and lots of them. With the cart piled high I go through the cashier and head straight for Sam’s hot dog stand. I’m hungry and tired. I plop down at one of the tables and delve into the hot dog and big cold drink. I love their big hot dogs.
I’ve purchased several, quite heavy, 40 count bottles of water and by the time I wrestle those and everything else into the back of my van I’m worn to a frazzle. Pulling out of Sam’s parking lot I glance down and there on the seat lay the C.D.’s and D.V.D.
“Ohhh, I’ll take them some other time. I’m tired,” I say out loud to no-one, since no-one is in the car with me. Or so I think. “No, take them now.” There’s that voice again. My immediate reply is, “I’m tired, I want to go home and get this stuff un-loaded.” “Take them now.” Irritation is rising within me. I pull into a small strip mall and grab the cell phone. It rings and rings and finally the voice mail picks up. Happily I leave a message, “Hi, I’m leaving Sam’s and I was going to drop off these C.D.’s but since you aren’t home I’ll do it later,” and hang up.
Backing the car out I’m at the intersection where I turn right towards home or left toward my friend’s house. “Take her the C.D.’S now!” Slapping the steering wheel and angrily stating, “Oh for crying out loud she isn’t even home!” Whipping the car into the left turn lane I’m fuming. Okay, so I can still act like a child having a temper tantrum. I would like to assert my free will some times! No, lightning didn’t hit me.
Turning into my friend’s driveway her garage door is open, her car backed in part way, and she’s unloading boxes from the back. I don’t apologize to the Lord. She and I stand in the shade of the garage and during our short conversation she tells me something the Lord had just told her that morning.
As the conversation continues all of a sudden she almost yells, “Thank you! I really needed to hear that!” Immediatedly I know the Lord wasn’t insisting on my returning those c.d’s just because I was close by, but was using me to give her the confirmation that she needed. We had a good laugh, when I wasn’t choking on the words, as I told her about arguing with Him about coming to her house. “You know better!” she laughed.
So many times we think we’re on the same wave length as the Lord and think we know exactly what He is up to. I thought He was sending me there, since I was so close, and was saving me gas and time of having to return later, only to learn that in my selfish desire to go home I would have missed Him using me to give her what she needed right then.
Anyone who has read my book, “Laying Down my Net – A Walk of Faith” is saying, “Sue, you know better!” And yes I did apologize while driving home.
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