Jesus on a Stage Coach

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Imagine it. The horses are tethered, they stomp their feet in anticipation of a long trek and snort their disapproval of having to wait. John and Thomas crawl up onto the driver’s seat as Jesus throws open the stage door and takes his seat on the hard wooden bench. John gives a loud whistle as he cracks the whip above the horses and the coach jerks forward.

The day is hot even though the sun has just risen. Jesus leans back against the hard wooden seat. It will be a long ride along the dusty path. The wind blows his hair and reaching up He moves it out of His eyes. He can hear John and Thomas talking and occasionally laughter fills the air. He smiles and closes His eyes and is soon asleep.

A sudden jolt and dangerous tilting of the coach startles Jesus awake throwing Him against the wall. One side of the coach has collapsed and the coach suddenly stops. John and Thomas jump down from their perch and Thomas wrings his hands while groaning loudly. “What are we going to do?” He shouts while pacing back and forth in front of the broken wheel. “Where’s Jesus?” he shouts and spins around to see Jesus carefully maneuvering His way out of the coach.

Thomas runs to Him, “The wheel is broken, Lord, what are we to do? We don’t have a spare. We’re stuck out here!” Sweat pours down his face and he quickly swipes it out of his eyes. Fear has gripped him and Jesus gently places His hand on Thomas’s shoulder, “Fear not, Thomas, I am with you.”

Jesus walks to the side of the stage-coach. He stands studiously peering at the good wheel with John and Thomas close behind Him.

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“Sit!” Jesus says to the two disciples. “I want to tell you something.” They sit down on the ground in front of Jesus. “He’s going to tell us a story in the midst of this crisis?” Thomas thinks. John sits quietly waiting.

“Do you see this wheel?” Jesus asks, pointing to the stage-coach wheel. Both nod yes. “This wheel represents the body of Christ.” Thomas whispers, “Huh?” Jesus smiles then continues. “The spokes are My children.” Thomas moves his hat aside and scratches his head. John nods. “Pay attention, Thomas!” Jesus states. “Each spoke is equal but each has been given a divine purpose. One has a gift of prophecy, another has the gift of exhortation, another is a teacher, another a home maker, another a preacher. All work together to make the wheel, the church, strong.”

Jesus reaches over and takes hold of one of the spokes and gives it a good jerk. “As long as these spokes cling tightly to the hub the wheel will remain strong and sturdy. I tell you the truth, I am the hub that holds it all together.”

“Okay.” Thomas states and glances up at the hot sun shining down on them. “Now let’s go look at the broken wheel.” Jesus states and they stand and walk to the broken wheel.

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“What do you see?” Jesus asks. Thomas is quick to reply, “A broken, crushed wheel and we’re stuck out here in this heat.” “Oh ye of little faith.” Jesus states. “Look at it! I tell you the truth, the body of Christ is broken!”

“Huh?” Thomas says. John nods in understanding.

“My shepherds are not teaching My Word. They are following the dictates of what the people want to hear. They are accepting evil as good and turning good into evil! Instead of loving one another as I love them they are divided. They are accepting the ploys of the enemy to destroy their faith. When one falls away the others are quick to condemn.”

Thomas sits quietly and John asks, “I’m not sure I fully understand. How does this relate to this broken wheel and the circumstances we are in, Lord?”

“Do you not yet understand, John? When one spoke is broken the wheel can still turn, the others offer support. It keeps the wheel from completely falling apart. But when several spokes break it weakens the whole wheel until eventually the wheel can not move forward. It lies dead in the sand.” Jesus points to the broken stage-coach wheel, “Just like that! What good is that wheel?”

Thomas states dejectedly, “Good for nothing.”

“That’s where my church is heading unless the body repents and comes together in unity. If My children will turn back to Me I will hear their prayers and heal their land but they must stop being weak in their faith, silent in the face of evil, and stand up to the sins in the world or the church will be as weak and damaged and useless as this wheel.”

Thomas shifts uncomfortably. He still doesn’t get it and asks, “But what are we to do?” and thinks,  We’re still stuck out here.  

Jesus turns and points to a large stick in the distance. “Have faith! Thomas, go get that long stick over there.”

“What for?” Thomas asks.

“You’ll see. Just trust Me.”

Thomas retrieves the long stick. “Now what?”

“Strike that broken wheel three times with it.”

“Huh? What good is that going to do?”

“Just do it, Thomas!” Jesus states emphatically.

Shaking his head in bewilderment Thomas strikes the broken wheel.

Jesus leans back in His seat as the dust from the spinning coach wheels and the horses hooves billows through the open window, When are they going to trust Me!? He thinks and closes His eyes.

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A Little Twist to Matthew 14

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Some of the ladies from my support group and I decide to go on a retreat at the lake. We rent a small fishing boat, nothing fancy or anything like a ship. We row our sun tanned selves out to sea as we sing row, row, row your boat and enjoy the warmth of the sun. Kicked back and relaxing on the smooth blue water the wind begins to pick up.

In a very short time waves start slapping the sides of our boat. The four of us sit wondering, “What’s going on? It was smooth just a few minutes ago.” One lady looks at me, then another. After all I am the facilitator of the group and don’t I have all the answers? The waves begin to get larger. The wind picks up even more.

We sit a little closer to each other but no one says the dreaded words, “I’m scared.” Water starts splashing over the sides. The boat rocks and is getting tossed about. Hands cling to the sides with white-knuckled death grips.

As I sit there wondering what to do I look out over the expanse of the water. Off in the distance I see what I think is a man. A man, out here? I must be hallucinating! I guess I’m not, for the man comes closer. Oh my gosh, I am hallucinating! He’s not swimming out here to save us, He’s walking on TOP of the water! The others have now seen Him, too.

The four of us huddle together. We’re scared more of this “ghost” than we are of drowning. I try to reassure the others, “Don’t be afraid, it’ll be over soon. We’ll all jump overboard before it gets here.” Arms squeezing each other, a death grip, clinging together, we watch as the “ghost” gets closer and closer. “On the count of three we all stand up and jump,” I whisper. Our eyes are riveted to the figure that’s slowly strolling across the water, like He’s taking a stroll in the park on a sunny day, the figure approaches.

Suddenly realization smacks my brain. “This isn’t a ghost! We don’t have to jump to our deaths! It’s Jesus ladies! Hip hip hurrah. Three cheers for the Lord,” I shout. Not thinking we could tip the boat in a split second, we all stand up. Some look closer to make sure I’m not playing some game with their minds. Jesus comes closer and says, “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” (v.27)

With a huge sigh of relief we all settle down. As the wind dies down frowns and tears turn to sighs of relief. But, I still have some doubts. I mean okay I’m sure this has to be Jesus. After all nobody I know can walk across the top of water. “If You’re REALLY Jesus, tell me to come to you, on TOP of the water”, I say in a cocky voice. Jesus just looks at me like, no problem. “Come!” is all He says.

Without hesitation, we four put our heads together. “Are you going to get out of this boat?” one asks me in a whisper while sneaking a peek at Jesus.  Glancing over my shoulder, then turning back to the others, “Do you think I should? I mean, He is Jesus!” Another whispers,”You can trust Him, I think.”

Jesus stands waiting patiently while I make my decision. He knows this is a tough request because He also knows my past. Christ doesn’t say, “Oh come on! Don’t be a chicken.” He just waits. Standing there right on top of the water like it’s no big deal.

Christ has no doubts, but I do! Glancing at Him then looking to the ladies I bravely state, “Okay, but wait a minute. I have to fix my hair. I’ll get a shower cap or something just in case I sink. I don’t want to get my hair wet.”

Jesus waits. I scrounge around the bottom of the boat and finally find a swim cap and pull it on over my head. My mind starts racing. He wants me to get out of this boat! That’s deep water out there! Is He nuts or what?  Standing in the middle of the boat I suddenly feel a tug on my T-shirt. One of the ladies says, “Maybe you shouldn’t do this.” I look back at Jesus. “Are you sure this is what You want me to do?” I ask Him. With a smile that could melt butter He looks at me and never says a word but I can tell what He’s thinking, “You don’t trust Me. You think I’m going to ask you to do something that will hurt you.”

Hesitantly stepping to the edge I place my hands on the boats rim and pick up my right foot to swing it over the edge. I stop. “Maybe I need some make-up. After all, He is good-looking.”  With a quick, “Just a sec,” I jerk my foot back into the boat. Rummaging around again I find a tube of lipstick and quickly slather my lips.

Some may find this quite odd but we survivors are always ready for the unexpected. We learned to be prepared and cautious and not to trust just anyone because we never knew who or what was lurking around the corner or would show up in the dark. But lipstick?

Jesus waits. He doesn’t sneer. He doesn’t tap His foot making little splashing sounds. He smiles and waits with the patience of Job, and waits. My mind races. Maybe I better find a float. What if a fish swallows me? I wonder if there are sharks out here. I glance back at the Man on the water. “Should I really trust this Guy?” 

Finally I gulp and take a deep breath and place one leg over the edge of the boat. “Oh jeeeeez this water is cold!” Bravely I tug at my shorts, take another breath and slowly sit on the edge with both feet touching the water. I hear a whispered, “The fool’s going to drown.” I slowly stand and woe, I’m standing on top of the water!”

All eyes are on me. Intensely I look at Jesus and think, This is cool but I must be nuts! Cautiously placing one foot in front of the other I take cautious steps and suddenly shout, “Hey, I’m walking on water!” Taking more cautious steps I keep my eyes on Jesus. With a little more confidence I get a little spring in my step. Smiling, Jesus is four or five feet in front of me. Love and patience glows across His face.

Wanting to tip-toe and maybe do a little dance I feel wonderful! Keeping my eyes glued to Jesus I feel like this is the greatest thing I’ve ever done but suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I see wind coming across the lake and it’s headed straight for me.

Fear grips my belly. I’m not sure what to do. Just for an instant I look toward the wind and in that split second down I go! The cold water engulfs me up to my waist and my face is a picture of terror. I hear the loud gasps from the others in the boat. My eyes are the size of meat platters and I scream, “Lord, save me!”

The words no sooner leave my lips and Christ reaches His hand out to me. “You of little faith,” He said, “Why did you doubt?” (v.31) He helps me to climb back in the boat and the ladies begin to worship Him. I am safe. We are safe. Jesus is here. We all bow our heads in prayer. “Thank you Lord that You are the One we can trust and look to for all of our needs.”

As the little fishing boat gently glides to the shore we continue to praise and worship Jesus. People are gathered cheering and waving as we approach the shore. We each disembark and without a moment’s hesitation begin telling all those we can about how Christ saved us.

“and all who touched Him were healed.” (v.36)

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I Should Know Better!

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The night was long with everything under the sun running rampantly through my mind. The pillow didn’t feel right, flipping from one side to the other side my body was taking a beating. Sitting up, laying down, wanting to pull my hair out and scream, rebuking the devil, sleep finally comes.

The new day has dawned all too quickly and dragging my weary body to the edge of the bed I ask the Lord, “What would You have me do today?” I’m hoping He’ll say, “Oh My sweet child, you’re so tired just roll over and go back to sleep. You need your rest.”

Sitting there hoping upon hope, I await the sweet words of the Lord. “Do what I told you to do yesterday,” was His reply. With a groan I go about showering, getting dressed, and shoveling a bowl of cereal down my throat one spoon full at a time.

Grabbing the long list of items I need to get at Sam’s I make my way to the car. “You forgot the C.D.’s” the Lord says. Hands on the steering wheel, motor running, garage door up, “Oh I’ll take them some other time.” “Take them now. You’ll be close to her house.”  You see, I had some C.D.’s and a D.V.D. I needed to return to my friend who lives just a couple of miles from Sam’s, which is a 20 minute drive for me.

I spend a couple of hours in Sam’s gathering up the supplies I need. Those things that are essential for every day living; huge packages of toilet paper that won’t require my making another run to store any time soon. No-siree, I hate shopping so to be able to buy in bulk makes me quite happy. Grabbing the big bundle of Kleenex with several boxes all bundled together pleases me to no end and the family size bags of potato chips last so much longer than the regular size. Essentials you see, and lots of them. With the cart piled high I go through the cashier and head straight for Sam’s hot dog stand. I’m hungry and tired. I plop down at one of the tables and delve into the hot dog and big cold drink. I love their big hot dogs.

I’ve purchased several, quite heavy, 40 count bottles of water and by the time I wrestle those and everything else into the back of my van I’m worn to a frazzle. Pulling out of Sam’s parking lot I glance down and there on the seat lay the C.D.’s and D.V.D.

“Ohhh, I’ll take them some other time. I’m tired,” I say out loud to no-one, since no-one is in the car with me. Or so I think. “No, take them now.” There’s that voice again. My immediate reply is, “I’m tired, I want to go home and get this stuff un-loaded.” “Take them now.”  Irritation is rising within me.  I pull into a small strip mall and grab the cell phone. It rings and rings and finally the voice mail picks up. Happily I leave a message, “Hi, I’m leaving Sam’s and I was going to drop off these C.D.’s but since you aren’t home I’ll do it later,” and hang up.

Backing the car out I’m at the intersection where I turn right towards home or left toward my friend’s house. “Take her the C.D.’S now!”  Slapping the steering wheel and angrily stating, “Oh for crying out loud she isn’t even home!” Whipping the car into the left turn lane I’m fuming. Okay, so I can still act like a child having a temper tantrum. I would like to assert my free will some times! No, lightning didn’t hit me.

Turning into my friend’s driveway her garage door is open, her car backed in part way, and she’s unloading boxes from the back. I don’t apologize to the Lord. She and I stand in the shade of the garage and during our short conversation she tells me something the Lord had just told her that morning.

As the conversation continues all of a sudden she almost yells, “Thank you! I really needed to hear that!” Immediatedly I know the Lord wasn’t insisting on my returning those c.d’s just because I was close by,  but was using me to give her the confirmation that she needed. We had a good laugh, when I wasn’t choking on the words, as I told her about arguing with Him about coming to her house. “You know better!” she laughed.

So many times we think we’re on the same wave length as the Lord and think we know exactly what He is up to. I thought He was sending me there, since I was so close, and was saving me gas and time of having to return later, only to learn that in my selfish desire to go home I would have missed Him using me to give her what she needed right then.

Anyone who has read my book, “Laying Down my Net – A Walk of Faith” is saying, “Sue, you know better!” And yes I did apologize while driving home.

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Dealing with Betrayal

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Betrayal can come in many and  various forms. It can be as simple, if you want to call it simple, as someone betraying your trust through telling another what you thought was told in confidence. There is the betrayal within marriages through adulterous behavior. Betrayal can come through domestic abuse. Maybe someone at your job betrayed you by lying to the boss. There’s many examples of how we are betrayed.

In my opinion (and many psychiatrists) the most damaging, deep, and most heartfelt betrayal is through a parent sexually abusing their child. From within the womb we are totally and completely dependent upon our mothers and fathers. Upon birth that dependence grows even more for the child. The child depends on the parents for nurturing, education, love for God, not to mention clothing, food, and housing. God instilled in us love. We are created to love and we do it naturally as a child. We love our parents regardless of anything they do.

Children are taught to hate, to distrust, to be suspicious and to take the blame. They were not born with that negativity. We’ve all seen cases where a child is horribly abused and yet they will protect the parent. It isn’t always that the parent/abuser has threatened them to keep quiet, it’s because of that God-given love instilled within us toward those who God chose to be our parents.

I was asked recently if after having been sexually abused if having my Dad admit to the abuse, if that was emotionally more difficult than the actual abuse. My answer was no, not for me. For me it was confirmation that the abuse really did take place. It stopped all the mind wrestling of whether it happened or not and put an end to the lies that were being told about it didn’t happen. But not everyone can answer that way. It is always very difficult to admit we have been betrayed. Especially if that betrayal was from someone we love.

Sexual abuse/incest is the most damaging of all abuse to a child. It attacks the body, soul, mind, and spirit of the child. The issues that are left from it are so vast it can take years to heal from the devastation. Most abusers will not admit their guilt. Many mothers will blame the victim or deny it happened or choose the husband over the child. Hopefully with disclosure becoming more prevalent that will change.

Who of us want to have to admit to ourselves that those who were given to us by God could do such a thing? Who wants to admit that the man we chose to love for the rest of our lives would sneak around behind our back in an adulterous affair? Or that our best friend would reveal a deep secret we shared, with someone else?

Betrayal will leave deep wounds. Whether they are bleeding wounds that we ignore, or ones that we continue to pick at is our choice. In the case of sexual abuse it may take years to heal those deep wounds. In Psalm 27:10 The Lord says, “Though my father and mother forsake me, the LORD will receive me.” Betrayal through abuse , by a parent, is forsaking the child! They have forsaken their God-given responsibility to care for, in a Christ-like manner, for the child that was placed in their care. Mothers and fathers that do nothing to protect the child, a co-conspirator, has emotionally, and in some cases physically, abandoned the child. Christ is there to receive you!

With any betrayal it is hard to “wrap our minds around” what was done. There is hurt, anger, denial, and eventually acceptance. We have a big choice to make. Do we forgive or do we continue to bleed? It can be mind-boggling to think that our own parents could betray us in such a way but if we do not release that hurt, through forgiveness, the betrayal will be like a gunny sack filled with rocks on our back.

With any form of betrayal do we choose to live with a heart filled with hate and bitterness toward those who have betrayed us or do we turn to Christ and give Him our pain? By holding onto the pain, not forgiving, we are bringing God’s judgment against us.  (Matt.5:22) We are hindering our prayers, (Matt.5:23) we’re causing a root of bitterness to take hold, (Heb.12:14-15) we’re allowing demonic strongholds to take hold, (Eph.4:26), and halting our healing (James 5:16).

Freedom from the heart wounds inflicted by an act/s of betrayal is obtained through our ability to seek Christ’s forgiveness and to offer our forgiveness to others.

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The Road to Life

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At first I saw God as my observer, my judge, keeping track of the things I did wrong so as to know whether I merited heaven or hell when I die. He was out there sort of like a president. I recognized His picture when I saw it, but really didn’t know Him. But later on when I met Christ, it seemed as though life were rather like a bike ride, but it was a tandem bike, and I noticed that Christ was in the back helping me to petal. I don’t know just when it was that He suggested we change places, but life has not been the same since.

When I had control, I knew the way. It was rather boring, but predictable, it was the shortest distance between two points. But when He took the lead He knew delightful long cuts, up mountains, through rocky places at breakneck speeds. It was all I could do to hang on!

Even though it looked like madness, He said, “Petal!” I worried and was anxious and asked, “Where are You taking me?” He laughed and didn’t answer, and I started to learn to trust. I forgot my boring life and entered into an adventure, and when I say, “I’m scared,” He’d lean back and touch my hand. I gained love, peace, acceptance, and joy; gifts to take on my journey, my Lord’s and mine. And we were off again.

He said, “Give the gifts away. They’re extra baggage, too much weight.” So I did, to the people we met, and I found that in giving I received, and still our burden was light.

I did not trust Him, at first, in control of my life. I thought He’d wreck it. But He knows bike secrets, knows how to bend to take the sharp corners, knows how to jump to clear high rocks, knows how to fly to shorten scary passages. And I am learning to shut up and petal in the strangest places, and I’m beginning to enjoy the view and the cool breeze in my face with my delightful constant companion, Jesus Christ.

And when I’m sure I just can’t do it anymore, He just smiles and says…”Petal!”

Name withheld – Angels by Grace – April 2003

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GO TO THE LAND I WILL SHOW YOU

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Standing on  the step-ladder with wallpaper stretched above my head the Lord spoke clearly. “You’re going to sell this house.”

Stopping in the middle of my project, with gooey wall paper suspended above my head, I simply replied, “Okay.” That was the beginning of a journey that would prove to be exhilarating, fearful, suspense filled, and frustrating as well as an adventure I would not want to do again.

“The Lord had said to Abram, “Go from your country, your people and your father’s household to the land I will show you.” Gen. 12:1

Looking back at my experience I feel like I might be able to relate to Abraham. At least be able to empathize with him. Maybe he had the same feelings as I did. Maybe not. But to suddenly be told I’m going to leave my long time home, my comfort zone, my church family and friends, to go where the Lord leads me, without knowing where exactly that is, can be quite scary and exciting.

Abraham did go. “By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go…And he went out, not knowing  where he was going.” Heb. 11:8

Boy can I relate to that! He packed up his tent and his belongs and followed where the Lord led him. How can someone do that!? How could I step down off that step-ladder and say, “Okay Lord. Where we going?” only to hear, “You’ll see.”  Abraham packed up everything he owned to follow wherever the Lord led him. I don’t know if his friends said, “Are you nuts!?” A couple of mine did. But Abraham trusted God to lead him, supply what he needed on the road, and take care of him when he got there. He followed the Lord because of his faith in the Almighty.

“And he believed in the Lord, and He accounted it to him for righteousness.” Gen. 15:6

Now don’t get me wrong here, I am no Abraham! I don’t even come close to this giant of a man in scriptures.  I never was told to stand over my child with a huge knife raised high in the air to be thrust through an innocent heart (Gen 22:1-19) images[5]and praise be to God I didn’t have to walk whatever distance to the destination where I would settle until the Lord said, “Start packing” again.

imagesCA2O5GUC  But I did the same thing! I packed up my belongings not knowing where I was being sent or what I was going to do when I got there or why the Lord was sending me there. I was trusting God through faith. Okay, I confess, I had some fears mixed with bouts of excitement. The “what if’s,” the, “am I hearing right?” the “but what about…?” came and on occasion I told the Lord I thought He might have some mental problems that needs to be looked into. But I went!

I don’t know if Abraham’s faith was stretched to the breaking point or not. I doubt that it was, being who Abraham was, but mine sure was. The long days on the road, the  constant questioning of the Lord, the tiny town situated out in the middle of a vast desert.

Isn’t there some scriptures that talk about growing in the Lord in the desert?

Oh, it wasn’t the deserts of Arizona, where the high temperatures sear your lungs. To me that would have been a blessing. At least they had cactus. The Lord knows I hate being cold! The Lord knows I have never lived in cold country, where when the temperature rose above 0 I thought it was a heat wave. The Lord knows I’ve never used a snow blower or have ever even seen one. The Lord knew He had to extradite me out of my comfort zone to be able to teach me to really trust Him and to expel the stubborn self-sufficient and independent attitude I had.

Boy did He place me in the right place! I knew not another soul, I do not like living in tiny towns with the gossip flying about like flies at a picnic. I like having doctors, hospitals, and medical help near by, and I like grocery stores that offer a wide variety of products. I especially like warm weather where I can wear shorts and light tops, not climates that require  three layers of warm clothes that still leave me shivering from head to foot. In other words, I like having my church family close by to encourage me, I like having friends stop by for a chat, and I admit I’m a warm weather loving urbanite! Georgia suits me just fine, thank you very much.

The eighteen months of continually crying, questioning, and having temper tantrums that would make a three year old look like an angel was taking its toll. Slowly His lessons were getting through and my trust was building, my independence was flying out the window, and when He finally said “Start packing” He didn’t have to tell me twice.

When I left that town the Lord had armed me with new confidence. Confidence in Him. He showed me (boy howdy did He ever!) that I am not the self-sufficient independent woman I thought I was. He showed me that I am absolutely nothing without Him. When I left that town I had far less questions, fewer doubts, and as I headed to the next “land I will show you” I did it with a deep-seeded confidence that whatever the Lord God calls me to do He is with me every step of the way, regardless of whether it’s a desert or the mountain top.

My advice to those of you who are ever so comfortable in your walk with our Lord, don’t let that arrogant spirit fool you.

You may end up in Wyoming!

~~~~~

“The pride of man will be humbled

And the loftiness of men will be abased;

And the LORD alone will be exalted in that day…,”

Is. 2:17

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