Looking back and seeing some of the things that Christ has done in my life, well, it totally amazes me! I say, some, because if I tried to list them there would be to many.
When I chose to give the Lord permission to do with my life as He sees fit I had no idea what or where He would take me. I had to choose to lay my will aside and let Him have control. It’s been like the song lyrics, “Jesus take the wheel.” That is not always easy!
I grew up having to survive a controlling, abusive, and manipulative home life. Once out of that environment I wanted control! No-one was going to tell me what I can or cannot do any more! So choosing to step aside and give control to God? Oh wow, that’s sure asking a lot, Lord. But…
The big test of my letting go was when the Lord said He wanted me to give up my home, friends, church, and all that I was familiar with, and comfortable with, and move to another land.
Are You kidding me!?
That started what I call a five year odyssey. He chose the state, “You’re moving me there to kill me, Lord!” He chose my car, “I don’t need a four wheel drive!” He chose my house. “I don’t like that house!”
Yep, we have to get out of His way in order to allow Him to fulfill whatever purpose He has for doing whatever He is doing – whether we understand it or not!
I was miserable for that first eighteen months. I felt trapped and fought tooth and nail. I learned quickly that God isn’t intimidated with my temper tantrums and when I’d run out of steam He was always there to accept my pleas for forgiveness. I’m sure He thought at times, “This is getting old, Sue.” I really thank Him that He has more patience than I do!
My next move was another surprise. “I want you to go visit your niece” the Lord instructed me one day. My niece lived in another state. ”
“Oh by the way. You’ll be buying a house while you’re there,” the Lord tells me as I’m speeding toward my destination. I almost fell out of the car!
By this time my training has taught me several things. One being, don’t bother to argue with God, you’ll lose! Another major lesson was I can trust Him. He did what He said He would do not just once but every time!
My trust was being built a step at a time and by the third move, oh yeah, more states, more houses, and more lessons, I was finally getting the big picture and not arguing and fighting as before. Okay, so I did try to assert my independence at times. It was all part of the process and didn’t seem to bother the Lord one little bit. He wanted me to trust Him enough to be obedient.
For five years the Lord had me moving from one state to another and in each state there were more lessons to be learned. I had to confront my wounded heart, I had to confront attitudes and false lessons that were taught me through the years, and confront my distrust. It was a journey that was very much like a roller coaster ride. About the time I would relax it was time for another scream. I missed my friends, my church family, I felt out of place in all the new locations and would tell people, “I’m just passing through.” None of the places felt like home regardless of how long I was there.
Finally one day the Lord said I could go wherever I wanted to live. My reply was, “I’ll go wherever You want me to go.”
I confess, I was tired of the moves and I was tired of the hard lessons.
I could visualize the grin on His face as the Lord said, “I want you back in Georgia”
I screamed, I cried, and I danced.
I was going home! But the lessons didn’t stop. He moved me three more times.
Now as I enjoy my home, I marvel at His grace. I look around and the gift of His mercy is spelled out. “You aren’t moving any more. This is My gift to you for your obedience,” Jesus softly whispered.
I have the home I wanted, I have His peace filling me, His assurance that He is always with me, and I take comfort in knowing that whatever lessons He sets before me will strengthen me in my walk with Him – if only I get out of His way.
“But Jesus replied, My Father is always working and so am I.” John 5:17
Author Sue Cass- “Dawn’s Light” – “Pursuit” – “Laying Down my Net-A Walk of Faith” – “Sacrifices of a Saint” – “Seek My Face.”
Blessings to you. 🙂